My Dearest Child,

As I sit down to write this letter to you on Mother’s Day, I am filled with a deep sense of gratitude and joy. Being your mother has been one of the greatest honors of my life, and I am so proud of the person you are.

Reflecting on my journey as a mother, I am struck by the many challenges and joys that we have shared together. From those sleepless nights when you were a newborn, to the long talks we’ve had as you’ve grown older, each moment has been a precious gift that I will always treasure.

As a mother, I have learned so much about the power of love, patience, and selflessness. I have watched you grow and develop, and I am constantly amazed by your strength, resilience, and kindness. Your unwavering spirit and dedication to your goals inspire me every day, and I am so grateful to be your mother.

I know that being a mother is not always easy, and there have been times when I’ve struggled to balance my responsibilities as a parent with the demands of life. But through it all, I have always been motivated by the love and connection that we share, and the deep sense of purpose that comes from raising you.

So, on this Mother’s Day, I want to thank you for giving me the opportunity to be your mother. Thank you for teaching me about love, courage, and compassion, and for reminding me of the beauty and wonder of life.

I am so proud of you, and I love you more than words can express.

With all my love, Mom

Happy Mother’s Day wishes to everyone that sacrifices self for the purpose of loving and raising another.

Dr. Julie and Sadie Quinn (sweet counsel)

Celebrate National Pet Month and mental health awareness month

May is a special month as it marks both National Pet Month and Mental Health Awareness Month. These two events highlight the importance of taking care of our pets and our mental health. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), one in five adults in the United States experience mental illness each year. Research has shown that interacting with pets can have a positive impact on mental health, making National Pet Month an ideal time to reflect on the benefits of pet ownership and mental health.

Pets can help reduce stress and anxiety

Research has shown that spending time with pets can reduce stress and anxiety. The act of petting a dog or cat can release feel-good hormones, such as oxytocin and serotonin, which can help lower stress levels. Pets can also provide a sense of calm and relaxation, helping to reduce anxiety and improve mood. For those struggling with mental health issues, pets can provide a comforting presence and a source of support.

Pets can increase socialization

Pets can also increase socialization and help individuals build connections with others. Owning a pet can give people a reason to get out of the house and interact with others, whether it’s at the dog park or on a walk around the neighborhood. Pets can help break down social barriers and provide an icebreaker for conversations. This can be particularly helpful for those struggling with social anxiety or isolation.

Pets can provide a sense of purpose

Taking care of a pet can give individuals a sense of purpose and responsibility. Pets require regular feeding, exercise, and attention, providing a structured routine and sense of accomplishment. This can be particularly helpful for individuals struggling with depression or other mental health issues that may affect their motivation and energy levels.

Here Are Some Ways To Celebrate National Pet Month While Focusing On Enhancing Your Mental Health.

Spend time with your pet. Just spending time with your pet can be a great way to improve your mental health and bond with your furry friend. Take your dog for a walk or hike in a nearby park or spend some time playing fetch in your backyard, or just interact with them in a playful way.  Not only will this give you both some exercise and possibly fresh air, it can also help reduce stress, anxiety and depression by enjoying your surroundings and recognizing it is the little things in life that really matter.

Snuggle up and Practice mindfulness with your pet. Pets can be great mindfulness companions. Take a few moments to sit quietly with your pet and focus on their breathing, movements, and sounds. While you are snuggling and petting your furry companion paying attention to your pet can help you stay present in the moment. Staying in the moment can reduce feelings of stress and anxiety. Being present helps you practice a sense of self-control and acceptance. While you are sitting and relaxing with your best furry friend think of their ability to accept and shake things off and soak in the peace of both of you living your best life in the moment together.

Volunteer with your pet. Volunteering with your pet can be a great way to celebrate National Pet Month and mental health awareness month by giving back to your community. Possibly look for a local organization that allow pets to accompany their owners while volunteering. This is a great way to give back and remember what you give is returned tenfold.  The feeling of helping someone else releases feel good hormones and provides a sense of purpose  and confidence that cannot be matched through any other activity.  

Try a new activity with your pet. Trying a new activity with your pet can be a great way to keep things fresh and exciting while presenting yourself with a fun challenge. Consider signing up for a dog-friendly yoga class or taking your cat for a walk on a leash. Maybe you can even take your pet on a trip somewhere. Trying something new can be a great way to bond with your pet and improve your mental health. Remember the challenge of trying something new, while having the benefit of support from furry friend will provide you the rewards surrounding the evolution of self.

Attend a pet-friendly event. National Pet Month is a great time to look for pet-friendly events in your community. Consider attending a pet parade, fundraiser, or adoption event. This can be a great way to socialize with your pet, meet other pet owners, and celebrate together the importance of pets in our lives.

National Pet Month and Mental Health Awareness Month are great opportunities to celebrate our furry companions and promote the benefits of pets for our mental health and wellbeing. By interacting and bonding with our pets in different ways, we can improve our mental health.  

Maybe it is no coincidence that May Celebrates National Pet Month and Mental Health Awareness Month together. The interactive bond between pets and their owners provides a great source of comfort, companionship, and support, providing a natural way to help improve individual mental health and well-being.

If you or someone you know is suffering with mental health please contact us. We Are Here To Listen.

Wishing you joy and companionship

Animal Assisted counseling of Indiana

Dr. Julie and Sadie Quinn (sweet counsel)

Celebrate National Therapy Animal Day

National Therapy Animal Day is an opportunity to celebrate the hard work and dedication of therapy animals and their handlers. It’s a chance to recognize the countless hours of training that go into preparing these animals for their important roles. It’s also a time to acknowledge the many benefits that therapy animals provide to people in need.

Research has shown that therapy animals can have a positive impact on a wide range of people, from children with autism to veterans with PTSD. In hospitals, therapy dogs have been shown to help reduce pain and anxiety in patients. In nursing homes, therapy animals have been known to improve mood and increase social interaction. In schools, therapy dogs have been used to help children improve their reading skills by providing a non-judgmental and supportive presence.

Therapy animals also play an important role in mental health therapy. Animal-assisted therapy has been shown to help reduce symptoms of depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder. The presence of an animal can provide a sense of comfort and safety, which can help people feel more at ease during therapy sessions.

In addition to their many benefits, therapy animals also provide a sense of companionship and unconditional love. They can be a source of joy and comfort to people who may be going through a difficult time in their lives. For many people, therapy animals become an important part of their support system.

National Therapy Animal Day is an important reminder of the incredible work that therapy animals and their human partners do every day. It’s a time to celebrate the powerful connection between animals and humans, and to recognize the important role that therapy animals play in improving the lives of people in need. So, take a moment today to appreciate the many ways that therapy animals make a difference in the world

Supporting Animal Cruelty Prevention Month

April is Prevention of Animal Cruelty Month. During this month it is time to bring awareness to the issue of animal abuse and encourage everyone you know to act in preventing it. Animal cruelty can take many forms, it ranges from neglect and abandonment to intentional harm and violence. It is a serious issue that affects millions of animals worldwide each year. It is a horrific act and has severe physical and emotional consequences for all our animal friends involved.

Are wondering exactly what is animal cruelty? Animal cruelty defined is any act of violence, neglect, or harm inflicted on an animal. This includes physical abuse, such as hitting, kicking, or beating an animal, as well as emotional abuse, such as neglecting or abandoning an animal, or subjecting it to extreme confinement or isolation. Other forms of animal cruelty include animal fighting, hoarding, and experimentation. It is hard to think of these acts of cruelty being perpetrated on animals that are helpless.

You can help in preventing animal cruelty. It starts with recognizing the signs of abuse and knowing what to do if you suspect an animal is being mistreated. Signs of abuse can include visible injuries, such as cuts, bruises, or burns, as well as behavioral changes, such as fearfulness, aggression, or withdrawal. Please, if you suspect that an animal is being abused or neglected, it is important to report it to the proper authorities, such as your local animal control agency or the police.

In addition to reporting suspected cases of animal cruelty, there are other steps you can take to prevent it. Of course, one of the most effective ways to prevent animal cruelty is to support animal welfare organizations and advocate for stronger animal protection laws. This can include donating to animal shelters or rescue groups, volunteering at a local animal welfare organization, or contacting your elected officials to urge them to support animal-friendly legislation.

Another way to prevent animal cruelty is to spread the word and educate others about the importance of treating animals with kindness and respect. This can involve teaching children about animal welfare, sharing information about animal abuse and how to prevent it on social media, or hosting a community event to raise awareness about the issue.

In ending I would like to say that preventing animal cruelty is an important human responsibility that we all share. By recognizing the signs of abuse, reporting suspected cases to the proper authorities, supporting animal welfare organizations and advocacy efforts, everyone can help ensure that my animal friends are treated with the care and respect they deserve.

Thank you for your help from Sadie Quinn your trusted canine therapy friend and my human partner Dr. Julie

Breaking the Cycle: Healing from a Narcissistic Mother

Growing up with a narcissistic mother can be an incredibly challenging experience. Narcissistic mothers are often self-absorbed, controlling, and emotionally abusive, leaving their daughters feeling neglected, invalidated, and unloved. As a daughter of a narcissistic mother, it’s important to recognize that your experiences are valid, and you’re not alone in your struggles.

Here are some tips for daughters of narcissistic mothers to help cope with the effects of their upbringing:

1. Recognize the Signs of Narcissistic Abuse

It’s essential to be able to recognize the signs of narcissistic abuse so that you can take steps to protect yourself. Narcissistic mothers often manipulate their children through guilt, shame, and fear. They may use tactics such as gaslighting, emotional blackmail, and emotional neglect to control and manipulate their daughters. By understanding the signs of narcissistic abuse, you can begin to set boundaries and protect yourself from further harm.

2. Seek Therapy

Therapy can be incredibly helpful for daughters of narcissistic mothers. A therapist can provide a safe space for you to explore your experiences, emotions, and behaviors. They can also help you develop coping mechanisms and strategies to overcome the effects of your upbringing. A therapist can also help you understand that your mother’s behavior is not your fault and that you deserve to be treated with love and respect.

3. Develop Self-Compassion

Growing up with a narcissistic mother can lead to feelings of low self-esteem, self-doubt, and self-blame. It’s essential to develop self-compassion and learn to be kind to yourself. You can practice self-compassion by treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and forgiveness. You can also try to identify your negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations.

4. Set Boundaries

Setting boundaries is crucial when dealing with a narcissistic mother. It’s important to set limits on what you’re willing to tolerate and communicate those boundaries clearly. You may need to limit your contact with your mother or cut ties altogether. Setting boundaries can be difficult, but it’s necessary for your mental health and well-being.

5. Build a Support Network

Having a support network can be incredibly beneficial for daughters of narcissistic mothers. You can reach out to friends, family, or a support group for validation, empathy, and understanding. You can also build a relationship with a mentor, therapist, or coach to provide guidance and support.

In conclusion, being the daughter of a narcissistic mother is a challenging experience, but it doesn’t have to define your life. By recognizing the signs of narcissistic abuse, seeking therapy, developing self-compassion, setting boundaries, and building a support network, you can overcome the effects of your upbringing and lead a fulfilling life. Remember, you deserve to be treated with love, respect, and kindness.

One Main Parenting Tool

There is only one main parenting tool that must be used to develop your child’s emotional behavior. I know that sounds unreal. How could there be just one main thing to do with all the information available that prescribes different methods and theories on how to parent your child. But it is true.

Yes, each theory or book does offer good tips on how to help your child develop into a healthy successful adult with happy productive relationships. But in reality, it all boils down to one main parenting tool. The one main parenting tool I am talking about is never clear because of all the extraneous information surrounding it. When I mention all of the information available I am sure you know what I am talking about.

You can read about how and when your child is supposed to crawl, walk, talk, eat hard food and on and on. You can also read about when your child is supposed to learn their ABC’s, nursery rhymes, and who “big bird” is. There are at least a thousand sites and books that describe what you can do as a parent to help your child be bigger and better, individually, and socially.

In fact there is so much information put out about what to do and what not to do it makes my head swim as a professional that is reading and learning for my work. For over the past 20 years as a clinical counselor working with children, adult and families from all walks of life I have realized that everything being written and said gives way to only one main parenting tool.

I have also realized how amazing it is that this one main parenting tool can set you free to be at ease and clear about the decisions you make raising your child. After studying child development and personal growth in school I incorporated this one skill into my counseling practice along with my practice of parenting.

I am very proud to say that families and children I have met along with my 3 children have learned and incorporated this one main thing to develop into responsible productive emotionally healthy adults. I wanted to state that because I am striving to make the point clear that by taking heed of this one main parenting tool you will have everything you need to help your child develop emotionally successfully.

It will give you the answer to what is the most important thing you can say to your child when they came in last place and didn’t get a prize like everyone else? It will answer what consequence you should you give them after they have emptied the aromatherapy sea salt all over the floor on the night you were planning on having a long overdue soaking retreat. It is the one main parenting tool to remain patient and calm while they are having a meltdown, when the bills are due, when everyone is hungry, school projects are due, someone has a meeting or game now and your workday was the soap-opera from you know where.

Because I have seen these situations occur I know your first thought is to have your own major meltdown by screaming and hiding but that will only double even triple the things that you needed to get done yesterday. If you are a caring parent who loves their child I know you relate to all the stress and pressure of parenting and wanting to get it right when it comes to raising an emotionally healthy child.

Also, along with relating to being a caring parent I know you can relate to the part that you are at the bottom of the “take care of” list. Ask yourself how you are supported, what do you eat for lunch, when and how do you take a break to recharge? These questions along with my education have shown me that being a caring responsible parent takes more than just book learning. I realized that in order to be a good parent you too have to continue to grow in order to help your child grow.

You need to learn how to eat right, sleep, exercise, learn new exciting things, relax, respond to bullies, feel confident, reach goals and take care of yourself first. You need to look inside at what pushes your emotional buttons, what made you so mad, what made you feel insecure, what made you feel happy and why can’t you complete important goals pertaining to you.

You need to look back at your childhood rearing, consequences, rewards, parents and how you were loved. As you explore, process, and incorporate different self-improving skills your life will begin to turn extremely joyful, fulfilling, successful and less stressful. You will make better decisions, be firm or gentle as needed, you will respond to your child more effectively without you getting in the way. And because of your life getting better your child’s life and your relationship with them will get better too.

Have I rambled on long enough to get my point across? I understand raising your child is one of the most difficult and rewarding jobs you will ever employ. That your child becomes your life and that you get lost in your child’s life. That seeking and learning information is important because you want to be the best parent to your child. But most importantly is that you realize as your child grows you continue to grow too.

Consciously or unconsciously, you relive your childhood memories and impressions. You replay your childhood traditions, traumas, and disciplines. And you consciously or unconsciously pass them on to your child to continue repeating your family history. In all cases either being aware of it or not your childhood development who you were and how you became you gets replayed into your child’s life.

 So, the most important thing to know about helping your child develop resilient emotional behavior is to learn about you and support yourself to grow more resilient and emotionally healthy. You may not at first glance notice that your individual exploration and growth will give you the one main parenting tool and answers to help your child. But look closely at all the literature and you will see that the most important piece of information being expressed is empowerment to you.

Yes, all of the child development literature is expounding on the number one main parenting tool. You can try some of the suggestions made by the experts to make your child listen better, cry less or jump higher. But if you don’t approach it from the perspective of knowing where you are reacting to address how your child is feeling the action of parenting will become a struggling disappointment of trial and error.

So let me say this one main point several different ways to make myself clear. Children learn by example. Actions speak louder than words. Your child will hear what you do, and so on and so on. So, the number one main parenting tool you can use to take care of the most important person on the face of the earth is to… Are you ready? DEVELOP YOU.

6 Ways to Develop Your Child’s Moral Character

Here are 6 ways to develop your child’s moral character in today’s technical world of computers and virtual reality where our children are socially interacting with video games, myspace, facebook and twitter real action takes a back seat to virtual action.

With that being said as a parent it is important to develop your child’s moral character by creating and enforcing consequences that are real and action based. Thinking and doing create the imprint of your child’s future behavior. Impress on your child the importance of responsibility by providing them guidelines and supporting their actions to rectify their negative behavior. When your child becomes part of creating the restitution and implements the action to right the wrong it will create a life long effect and build moral character.

Here are 6 simple guidelines to remember when developing your child’s moral character:

1. If you abuse it you lose it. This includes privileges of curfew, TV, video games, etc. Make sure to announce a concrete end date to the loss of their privilege and stick to it. Never create consequences with no ending, e.g. “it’s over when I say so”, or “Your grounded until you leave my home”.
2. Be kind to the vendors. This means they must be respectful to the supplier of the goods, or the supplies are no longer available. Allow your child the opportunity to rectify their actions by making an apology if they are disrespectful. Maintaining the wrong is not right until the apology is delivered and received.
3. If they break it, they fix it, to the best of their ability.
4. If they mess it up, they clean it up, on their own.
5. If you take something you give it back, double the original value. Remember value can be monetary or personal items.
6. If they do something mean, they do something nice, directly to the person that was affected.

Helping your child develop a moral character takes patience and consistency. Deliver these moral guidelines to your child in a direct manner without anger or criticism. Support your child’s ability to choose and take corrective action. Be understanding with them that the restitution may be difficult to do, but insist they follow through. Allow your child the opportunity to create and deliver the corrective action that restores the wrong to right. It is their thought process along with their doing that develops a child’s solid positive moral character.

Daily Thought

Remember how special and unique you are. You are one of a kind and no-one else can replace or do the things you are inspired and meant to accomplish. Those things are yours and yours alone to do. You are the only one who has the power and characteristics to complete your dreams. And your dreams accomplished translate to the good for all.

Daily Practice

Remember throughout your day how special you are. Celebrate you in small ways by telling yourself, rewarding yourself, or just thinking about your personal greatness. Don’t be afraid or shy away from this task. Celebrate you!

Have a Great Day and Believe in Yourself!